Cert 15
96 mins
BBFC advice: Contains strong language and suicide theme
If anyone asks me which is my favourite book, I feel compelled to reply "Fever Pitch".
Of course, I love classics such as Lord Of The Flies and To Kill A Mockingbird but no book has resonated as much as Nick Horny's hilarious diary of a football fan.
Sadly, the movie didn't do it justice. Colin Firth was far too posh to remind me of any soccer supporter I had known.
The same could be said of Hornby's follow-up: Hi-Fidelity. I loved the book but wasn't wild about its celluloid adaptation.
After those two, I was salivating like Pavlov's dog every time a Hornby book was released and was thoroughly satisfied by About A Boy which did translate into a rather good movie.
And then my hero lost his lustre and his next novel, How To Be Good, didn't resonate at all and four years later, A Long Way Down led me to give up on him altogether.
Thus, I can't say that I was looking forward to watching Pascal Chaumeil's big screen adaptation on Friday night.
It met expectation - a pretty dismal telling of a story which wasn't very engaging in the first place.
The premise is that four people of completely different backgrounds meet on the top of a London tower block where they have each intended to commit suicide.
Thus, they decide to agree a pact that they won't kill themselves until Valentine's Day.
Pierce Brosnan plays a disgraced former TV presenter, Toni Collette is the dowdy mother of a severely disabled son, Imogen Poots is a gobby daughter of a politician (Sam Neill) and Aaron Paul is a pizza delivery boy.
As the film progresses we discover more about each character and they become more devoted to each other.
The problem is that A Long Way Down is mean to be a black comedy but didn't elicit any more than a couple of sniggers.
Brosnan looks uncomfortable in his role, Collette seems strangely out of place in hers and the only stand-out comes from Poots, largely because she has the best lines.
Put simply, A Long Way Down is a dull book and it is now a dull movie.
Laughs: A couple of chortles
Jumps: none
Vomit; none
Nudity: Only a quick flash of Imogen's bum
Overall rating: 4/10